The World of Dating

After I had experienced love for the first time, I realized that I really enjoyed it.  I was always the "loner" type, and I loved having my space to enjoy "Nicole Time".  I was the kid that stayed home on Halloween just so I could have the house to myself for an evening.  However, I realized it's really nice to have someone to spend your time with and share things with on a more intimate level than just friendship.

Things didn't work with my "first love" because we wanted totally different things.  We ended things amicably, and we are still friends to this day.  He will probably always be special to me as most "first loves" are to girls.  Before I get too far into this story,  let me just say and remind my reader's that I didn't ever go through the boy-crazy dating phase as a teenager or even in college.  It  is hard to admit and kind of embarrassing, but as an adult, I finally went through my boy-crazy dating phase.  I met a lot of nice guys, and new friends.  

I met a guy I refer to a "the musician" he was a very down to earth and positive guy.  He played really good music and had a great voice.  We got along very well and enjoyed intellectual conversations which can be hard to come by in the now we live in.  We went on a few dates, and he introduced me to a lot of his music inclined friends.  He and I just didn't have that spark for dating.  We were great friends, but that was about it.

I also came across some not so great guys.  Guys that just thought I was going to sleep with them, but little did they know that I'm not the type of girl that sleeps around.

I met a guy I refer to as "the married guy".  We seem to hit it off pretty well.  He told me he was divorced and had a son.  We went on several dates and things were going well so I thought.  One day, while shopping at the mall in the shoe store guess who I run into.  Yep!  I ran into "the married guy" he is with his son and his WIFE.  Not ex-wife, his WIFE.  I knew right away it was his wife because like any girl that does online dating, I googled had already googled him to make sure he was safe to meet.  I froze when I saw them together, I didn't know what to say.  I ended up saying nothing and "the married guy" quickly veered his wife and child into a different direction.   Later, he tried to lie, and say that they decided to try to make it work, and revealed to me that he wasn't divorced, but separated.   That was really hard to believe since that very morning he was messaging me like nothing had changed in his life.  It really didn't matter what his excuse was, and I was not bummed about no longer dating him.  I was mad that he had lied that he had made me the other woman without my knowledge.  I went on a dating hiatus after this happened to me.  

I learned that even when you do your research sometimes things can still be overlooked, and not found.  Now "married guy" was just one of the bad apples of men I dated and was what finally mad me snap.  I realized that dating wasn't fun like my relationship with my "first love".  I came to hate dating.

When I wasn't even looking to date anyone, Chris came into my life.  Chris was immediately into me, but I had dated so much I was just done.  He talked me into just being his friend, and told me that he was going to make me like him in time.  I did everything in my power not to like him, and I made sure he was aware that I was not fond of him.   Surprisingly after some time, I came to see how great Chris was and I gave in to his charms.

I had finally found a relationship that was fun and full of joy similar to the feeling I had dating my "first love".

 

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Comments (6)

  1. Bloodlust-Prince

    I only started dating when I was 18, which for a millennial guy is quite odd. I haven’t dated since, it just feels pointless and cumbersome.

    October 17, 2016
    1. dramaqueencoley15

      I admit I have thrown in the towel a few times because it can be very complicated at times. Plus, you never know who you can trust, but being the hopeless romantic I am I try to be optimistic. Now being a realist, trying to be optimistic is quite a challenging task.

      October 17, 2016
      1. Bloodlust-Prince

        Optimism never hurt anybody. Lol. Indeed it is.

        October 18, 2016
  2. eiai

    That’s such a good story and a good lesson. People can definitely put on an act. I like the people you can be honest with from the beginning and they take their lead from you, knowing you’re being honest and that brings out the honesty in them. I find that if you pay attention to people’s words and actions and they don’t line up that’s when you know something is up. Dating is hard, relationships are hard….but the happy moments do make it worth it I find.

    October 18, 2016
    1. dramaqueencoley15

      Yes, I choose to learn something from each experience even the bad ones.

      October 20, 2016
      1. eiai

        Even if sometimes it’s hard in the moment lol.

        October 20, 2016